For Those About to Rock
by AberrantScript
Summary: As Luna and Linc enter the theatre for their first AC/DC concert, they notice that something isn't quite right. Then, a zombified AC/DC appear on stage and Linc is abducted by the undead. Luna must fight through wave after wave of undead to the classic soundtrack of hard rock perfection. Rated M for graphic violence and swearing. (No loudcest)


**Author's Notes:**

So, this is my first full-length oneshot that features _no loudcest_. I've gotten so many requests for _no loudcest_ that I figured it was time to write a story with, you guessed it, _no loudcest_ in it. That didn't stop me from throwing in a tease, though, haha! So, I had lots of help and support from Flagg when preparing for this story. In a way, this story is dedicated to him, but it's also dedicated to all the naysayers and anti-lewd readers that have bothered me weekly since July. I hope you all like this story as much as I did writing it!

I was going for something ridiculous, hilarious, fun, and bouncy... with a drop-dead sexy babe wielding guns and murdering zombie hordes like she's Lara Croft. I threw in numerous references to three major zombie-esque that inspired me while writing this. And this is really different from my style, but I threw in numerous British-style swears in here. I thought it'd be hilarious. (I don't know if I have British readers. If so, no offense is intended!) Additional notes at bottom.

 _Enjoy~!_

Disclaimer: _The Loud House_ Copyright Nickelodeon (2017); _Hells Bells_ (1980), _Fire Your Guns_ (1990), _Thunderstruck_ (1990), _Back in Black_ (1980), and _Highway to Hell_ (1979) by AC/DC.

* * *

FOR THOSE ABOUT TO ROCK

A boy and a girl walked side by side through the darkened foyer. They approached a ticket stand, but no one manned it. They saw no guards nor ushers. They looked at each other with smirks and shrugged their shoulders.

Looks like they'd get into the AC/DC concert for _free_.

An eleven year old boy in black-dyed jeans and grey tee; the word _Thunderstruck_ printed in white letters, the 's' stylized like a lightning bolt; held the door open for his sister.

A fifteen year old girl in a purple-plaid skirt, knee-high leather boots, a shredded tee, and a grey denim jacket rubbed her brother's hair as she stepped into the theatre.

"So, where do you think we should sit, Luna?" asked the boy as he stepped toward a set of stairs leading down past rows and rows of seats.

Luna followed, her black-gloved hands gripping the banister as they walked down toward the front. "As close as we can, I guess…"

They kept going in the faint lighting issued from dilapidated fixtures hanging hazardously from the ceiling. Their progress was slow and steady, going down the steps within an arm's length of each other.

"Hey, Linc?" Luna turned toward her brother, pausing their trek for a moment.

"Yeah?" Lincoln turned toward his sister.

"Are you noticing anything weird?"

Lincoln raised an eyebrow. "You mean, like how there is literally no one here?"

Luna bit her lip in concern. "Yeah…"

Lincoln shrugged his shoulders and took a step forward. "Eh, maybe they're not performing tonight. There was _no one_ at the ticket counter after all."

Luna followed behind her brother, her head staring at his tennis shoes. "Maybe."

But the more they walked, the more red klaxons sounded off in her mind. If they weren't performing, the front door would have been locked. And even if the place was closed, wouldn't the lights be off… and in better shape? Her eyes looked up momentarily to see one can light hanging limply by the wires feeding it with power.

 _Yeah, something's off_ …

When they made it to the very front, there were no barriers. Which, again, was _unusual…_

The siblings looked around but saw nothing.

No people.

No equipment.

No drugs.

 _Nothing_.

Except…

Luna put a hand above her eyes to block out the faded light. She squinted her eyes at what she saw. _Smoke…?_

Lincoln strained his ears when he heard a faint noise. "Hey, Luna, do you hear that?"

She turned from the smoke slowly roiling from the center of the stage to look at her brother. Her ear twitched when she heard it.

A hiss. Low, but steadily increasing in pitch and tempo.

Suddenly, lights erupted from the stage and temporarily blinded the siblings. The harsh smell of smoke filled their lungs. The loud crunching sound of gears, the scraping sound of sliding metal pained their ears.

When their eyes finally adjusted to the blinding light, they saw five bodies slowly raise up on center-stage on a moving platform. They were unmoving, their heads hung low. A mic, two guitars, a bass, and drums. They looked so familiar, but so different.

Linc craned his neck toward the ceiling when he heard that strange hissing again. He started tugging on Luna's skirt. "H-hey…"

Luna ignored him to get a better look at the band in front of her. Then, one looked up and she gasped.

His face was rotted and lifeless, yet moving into a chilling smile. His bandmates slowly rose their heads…

Then, from nowhere, and everywhere, the sound of a bell rung across the large room.

 _Hiss!_

Luna felt Linc tug on her skirt again and she turned. Her heart came up in her throat at the sight of something mangled and _dead-looking_ running straight for them. Fear paralyzed them as the creature snatched Lincoln away from her side and crawled onto the stage.

" _LINC!_ "

" _LUNA!_ "

She watched in horror as that _thing_ ran past the band into the darkness.

Then, she heard another bell sound.

And another.

And another.

And another.

On the sixth chime, the band began playing, and her mouth fell wide open.

They were a zombified AC/DC!

Suddenly, she felt a weight in her jacket's pocket and she reached a hand in and pulled out a 9mm. She turned it over in the lighting and felt a strange sensation wash over her body.

Something like vengeance and hatred and desire all mixed into one potion that could only be described as _wrath_. She held the gun up and aimed down its sights and she felt _powerful_.

"Hold on, Linc. Your big sis is comin' for ya."

The hissing was increasing from all around, and Luna turned her fiery eyes on a dozen undead monsters slowly crawling overtop chairs and banisters.

 _I'm rolling thunder, pouring rain…_

She leveled the semi-auto at the closest one's mangy face and she pulled the trigger. In an instant, the firing pin struck and white-hot gas erupted from a mini-explosion, sending forth a slab of lead straight into the beast's head clean through.

It felt back, properly dead and lifeless, and Luna grinned sideways. "You wanna take my brother from me?"

 _I'm coming on like a hurricane._

She side-stepped and fired into the next. "Fuck." Step, fire. "You." Step, fire, "All." One grabbed her shoulder from behind and she turned around. Her fist swung out and a knife materialized in hand, slashing through its rotted brain matter and splitting its head asunder in a bloody mess. "To Hell!"

 _My lightning's flashing across the sky._

More were coming, their heads shaking, and Luna was worried she didn't have enough bullets for them all.

 _You're only young but you're gonna die._

She kept firing without stopping to reload. Only when she reached victim number fifteen, did she finally realize her weapon had unlimited ammo! She grinned as she stepped up to a zombie with its legs blown off.

 _I won't take no prisoners; won't spare no lives…_

She felt a weight in her jacket pocket and she pulled out a frag grenade. She stuffed it into its munching jaws and pulled the pin. "Enjoy, you fuckwit'd twatface."

 _Nobody's putting up a fight…_

A fiery explosion of black smoke and mangled zombie bits served as Luna's backdrop as she turned toward the remaining horde, the light shining off her black weapon as she sighted it with her blazing eyes.

 _I got my bell, I'm gonna take you to Hell…_

She watched calmly as the action slid back and forth, springing used shells off into the void, as zombie after zombie fell dead before her menacing presence.

 _I'm gonna get ya; Satan get ya!_

Luna put her hands in the air and spun slowly, her grin devilish and sneering as she looked at the dozens of bodies lying at her feet. She stepped over to the severed head of one zombie and shot it again just for fun. "Looking good, wankstain." She laughed harshly.

 _Hells bells!_

She heard some more hissing and felt a weight descend on her back. She reached up and felt a long handle, and pulled a sword from its sheath.

 _Hells bells, you got me ringing._

The light glinted off the katana as she swung it up and down.

 _Hells bells, my temperature's high._

She held the blade forward, the handle clutched near her ear, and she looked down the slender blade at a fresh wave of undead lurking closer toward her.

 _Hells bells!_

Her face was grinning widely as she spun into a jump, her skirt flowing around her body playfully; her blade cut through the closest one.

 _I'll give you black sensations up and down your spine…_

She landed on a knee and struck her sword into the spine of another one. With a twist, she pulled the blade to the side and laughed as she watched a perfect _seppuku_ be performed.

 _If you're into evil, you're a friend of mine._

She stood, her katana held to the side, and looked at them with darkened eyes. Blood was pumping fiercely through her body, adrenaline coursing through her veins. Every nerve tingled pleasurably as she raised the sword into the air and cleaved another zombie in two.

 _See the white light flashing as I split the night_.

She moved like lightning, pulling the sword lazily behind her as she cut through them like butter. Her chest arching forward as she performed an upward slash, revealing the soft curves of her young body. Her hips swung as she kicked a zombie down, right before jabbing its heart. Leaning over its dead body, sweat dripped from her arms onto the ground. Her cheeks were flushed and lively.

 _Cause if God's on the left, then I'm stickin' to the right!_

She turned around and saw one lonely zombie dawdling in the corner, trying to get to her but unsure how to climb over a seat. " _Aww,_ the wee lamb."

 _I won't take no prisoners; won't spare no lives._

She sauntered over toward it and felt mild amusement at its hopeful, lusty gaze on her body. She put a hand out toward it and chuckled when it tried to sink its rotted teeth into her fingers, only to trip over a pop can.

 _Nobody's putting up a fight._

She stepped onto its back, and the creature stilled beneath her. For one split second she felt sympathy for it… but then she smiled widely.

 _I got my bell, I'm gonna take you to Hell…_

She put the katana's point on its neck and breathed a calming gulp of air. "Oi, mate."

The creature tried turning toward her and she was mildly surprised that it could understand her.

She jabbed the sword through its neck.

 _I'm gonna get ya; Satan get ya!_

She knelt beside it. "That's for taking my brother, ya wankin' piss stain."

Its splurting blood gurgled in reply.

She stood up and wiped her hands off on her purple skirt. "Wha's that? I couldn't hear ya over the sound of the UK leaving the EU."

 _Hells bells!_

She walked off, laughing; feeling like all the tension in her body was let loose like an arrow from a bowstring.

But then, the band suddenly stopped.

Luna looked up and pouted. "Oh, bugger. I loved that song!"

She felt a new weight in her jacket and she reached in and pulled out an M4A1. "How the bloody hell did that fit in there!?" She looked it over and felt it in her hands. It felt _good._ "Who fuckin' cares? Things are about to get _fun!_ "

The zombie band AC/DC started a quick-paced riff, and Luna began shaking her hips to the melody, closing her eyes, and became one with the song.

When she opened her eyes, she saw a new wave of zombies climbing through broken windows, down the walls, and over seats. She saw one particularly nasty one running with wind-milling arms from the stage.

She looked it in its beady eyes.

The beast howled in rage.

She blew a kiss and raised her rifle at it. When the band began singing, she joined them.

"Wild beast, I'll make you mine!"

She pushed the trigger down, already knowing she'd never need to reload, and let loose a tidal wave of chaos as she strafed the entire stage with death metal. _Heh, Luan would love that one._

"Taste your kiss; sweet lips divine!"

Huh, apparently recoil wasn't a problem to worry about either.

That raging zombie boss ran off into the night, and she turned a full circle, never letting go of the trigger as a dozen undead fell at her feet in a writhing mass.

"She got moves, drips of sweat."

She wiped her brow, her grin never leaving, and she rocked her hips side-to-side as she sauntered over to a window where zombies were funneling in like a nest of spiders.

"She got eyes of blue-" The flash of her gun lit up her sapphire eyes, menacing and hysterical. "-body curves-" She hip-checked a zombie with a shapely bum, the barrel of her gun following its falling head. "-legs that'll break your nerves." She front-kicked a zombie and watched it fall back like a rag doll.

"Fire, when she's going down!"

She was cackling when she felt a new weight, this time in her skirt. She reached her hand in and felt something long and round, and _hard_ and _thick~_ She pulled out a bazooka.

"Fire, then she make you drown!"

She hopped up onto a chair and looked at the sea of undead before her and smirked. She didn't even bother aiming, just holding the bazooka on her shoulder and pressing the trigger down. The satisfying sound of a hissing rocket flying through the still air left her body shaking in anticipation.

"FIRE!" The exploding bits of half a dozen zombies titillated her nerves. "-then she blow you round!"

She looked around at the remaining zombies; them pausing to look at the blackened scorch mark before turning to her in confused stupor.

"YEAH! YOU WANT SOME FUN!?"

The zombies nodded their heads and began running toward her.

Darkness fell across Luna's eyes as she tilted her head down, a sadistic pleasure racing up and down her spine.

"Fire your guns!" She kept her finger on the trigger as rocket after rocket let loose into the swarming herd of undead, blowing their various body parts high into the air.

She looked around and saw that raging zombie had returned and she felt a new weight in her skirt. Without thinking, she reached into her waistband and gripped a handle and pulled out an M249 SAW.

She swung the hefty weapon onto her hip, not even noticing the sheer weight of the gun, and looked the dread zombie in its flaming eyes.

 _HOWL!_ It raged its head side to side, taking off toward her in a dead sprint.

She bit her teeth at him. "That lady bites hard style~"

The zombie jumped to the side when Luna pressed down on the trigger, splattering bullets everywhere.

"Drips of sex~" Luna hopped off the chair and followed after the beast as it hid behind a stone column. "Eyes are wild~" Her face was grinning hysterically, her cheeks hurting from her constant smile.

The zombie tried to climb up, but a stray bullet caught its arm, and it fell onto its back.

"She got moves~" Luna sauntered around the column, the barrel of the gun resting on the demon's shocked face. "Long, long legs~" She put the heel of her boot on its neck, and the zombie looked up her long, endless legs. "She got eyes of blue-"

It looked into her piercing eyes and felt her boot begin crushing its neck; its hands scrambling to push the boot off.

"-body curves, leg that'll shake the earth!" She pressed with all her might, feeling bone and sinew give way under her strength. With a satisfying _crunch_ she watched the unholy light leave its eyes and she turned around. What few zombies remained turned tail to run.

"Fire! When she's going down!"

Laughing like a madwoman, Luna let loose her endless shower of bullets into the retreating crowd.

"Fire! Then, she make you drown!"

Her eyes glinted under the flashes of her firearm, uncaring and without remorse.

"Fire! Then, she blow you round!"

She dropped her gun without a second thought when she felt new weights fill her pockets. She reached in a found a half dozen sticky grenades.

"Yeah! _You want some fun!?_ "

She reared back an arm and lobbed one, getting a twinge of pleasure down her spine when it stuck onto the hand of an undead and it tried to pull it off but couldn't.

"Fire your guns!"

She watched as explosion after explosion erupted like the fall of dominos as zombies ran for safety with grenades stuck to their bodies.

"Fire your guns!"

She threw her hands into the air and stuck out her tongue as blinding light shone all around her, the sensational sound of death and chaos filling her ears like the bleeding buzz of helicopter blades.

" _Fire your guns!_ "

She looked onto the stage and saw AC/DC shaking their heads to the beat and she joined them, her eyes closed, her heart pumping, her body thrumming with ethereal power.

" _FIRE YOUR GUNS!_ "

The guitar riff died slowly, and Luna was left with a dull, buzzing noise in her ears. She was panting and sweaty.

Then, she heard a giggle, and from the main entrance where she and her brother had walked through not long ago… came a little girl.

With a tilted head, soulless eyes, and a wide, fanged grin, the girl put her hands into the air and screeched.

Behind Luna, the band started up another fast paced riff and her eyes widened. _Thunderstruck!_

The walls began quivering under the strain of the girl's voice and the band's vocal melodies.

 _Thunder!_

Skylights shattered, pieces of glass raining down upon the teen girl. She covered her head with her roughened arms. The answering shrieks of banshees filled the endless room.

 _Thunder!_

She looked on as a dozen demons with naked female bodies and sharp wings flew into the room. Luna barked out laughter and stepped forward with open arms. "Come on! Is that the best you can do!?"

 _Thunder!_

Then, the girl smiled innocently before her head exploded into mush; releasing a giant centipede creature, which dangled from the girl's tiny body.

 _Thunder!_

" _Shite!_ " Luna rolled when boiling acid was spat toward her. "God, I've heard of people being a bleeding spunktrumpet, but this is ridiculous!"

 _Thunder!_

She turned around and in the corner a wooden box appeared out of thin air: a shiny question mark emblazoned on the lid. She sprinted toward it, hissing in pain when the banshee demons swiped at her arms with their talons.

 _Thunder!_

She slammed into it and hurriedly tried to open it. "Fuck, 950 quid!? Are you bleeding kidding me!? No fucking way, you jizzin' cockwomble!" She gave it one big kick and the lid flung open with elevator music.

 _Thunder!_

When the bright lights stopped, she beheld a strange device.

 _Thunder!_

Her open mouth twitched into a grin as she read two little words printed on the side: _Thunder Gun_.

She turned around with wide eyes to see three winged beasts swooping down at her. She hefted the gun in her arms and clicked the trigger.

The clapping boom of thunder shattered the room with noise.

 _I was caught in the middle of a railroad track._

And even though she couldn't hear their screams, she saw their wings cripple, their bodies cave in under the crushing weight of sound waves. She watched with bated breath as they fell to their deaths.

 _I looked round and I knew there was no turning back._

With a grin she stood confidently and clicked the trigger again, watching as tangible waves sprung forth and gripped the dark angels in their fatal claws, tearing wings, shredding bodies, snapping necks…

 _My mind raced and I thought, what could I do?_

That girl-centipede-freak shrieked again, but nothing would come to her aid. Nevertheless, it approached on bumbling girl legs, spitting acid at the agile and quick teen.

 _And I knew there was no help, no help from you._

Luna was grinning, spinning back and forth. The feeling of her boots crunching on the wooden floor panels, the swirling of her plaid skirt, the roughness of her jacket; they filled her mind with wild sensations she'd never noticed before. Her senses heightened as she realized a single misstep, a single slip would mean her death…

 _Sound of the drums beatin' in my heart._

She angled closer toward the distraught demon, the thunder gun held close to her chest. She slipped on a stray popcorn bucket and rolled into her fall. The searing pain of boiling acid fell onto her side and she hissed. Looking down, it was burning a hole in her jacket and she tore it off to save herself.

 _The thunder of guns tore me apart._

The centipede was hanging over her head, and Luna looked up into its excited eyes.

It was unprepared to see Luna's smirk, however, nor to feel the sudden embrace of death as Luna rapidly pressed the trigger until the gun grew hot under the strain of usage.

 _You've been thunderstruck!_

She jumped up and kicked the bug's head off, punting it toward the other side of the room with a loud, "Good _fuckety bye!_ "

Luna cheered, throwing a fist into the air. " _Huzzah!_ " Then, she turned back toward the band and saw what she'd been waiting on that whole time.

" _LINC!_ "

But he couldn't reply as he was strapped to a chair, tape binding his mouth shut.

Luna took a step toward him when she felt the ground shake beneath her feet.

On stage, the band began a final tune: this one bouncy.

A deep crack rippled in the floor, releasing a plume of fire and smoke.

Luna stared wide-eyed as the smoke roiled off.

Then, a gravelly voice drifted from the depths of Hell.

" _Back in black; I hit the sack._ "

A glowing head popped out of the earth, pulsing with energy.

" _I've been too long, I'm glad to be back._ "

The rest of its body crawled from the earth, and the ground sealed itself back underneath its glowing feet.

Luna stared in shock as it gurgled up radioactive material onto the ground like vomit.

" _Yes, I'm let loose from the noose!_ "

It suddenly hissed and took off toward Luna.

She broke from her stupor to flee for safety.

" _That's kept me hanging about!_ "

She saw a door and shouldered it open, promptly shutting it. In front of her were stairs and she ran toward them. Behind her, she heard the tell-tale signs of a metal door melting under chemical burns, and she gulped. Boiling acid was one thing… but radiation poisoning?

"Yeah, fuck that."

She was already one floor up when the glowing one pushed his grinning face through the oozing door opening.

"Heyo! _I've been looking at the sky cause it's getting me high._ "

He put his arms through it and pushed the glowing metal away like it was butter. He cracked his neck and eyed the stairs. Turning his head up, he could hear the sounds of frightened footsteps, and it titillated his undead sexual organs… what was left of them anyway.

" _Forget the hearse cause I never die!_ "

He turned toward the fourth wall. "Heh, some of you losers remember me, eh? What, you mad, bros?"

Luna reached the top of the steps and kicked the door open. In front of her was a throw switch with a zombie's hand attached to it and she hurriedly flipped it on. Turning, she could hear the glowing one singing at the top of his lungs as he walked up melting stairsteps…

" _I got nine lives; cat's eyes!_ "

She looked down and realized she was standing up on a catwalk. Zombified rock stars were banging their heads below her, and for one second she sighed. Even with mangy hair and rotting faces they were _hot_ …

She turned toward the doorway just in time to see a glowing light begin to light up the walls. Her eyes spotted a fusebox attached to some sort of lightning trap and she made a dash for it.

" _Abusin' every one of them and running wild!_ "

Luna hid against the wall and waited for him to step under the mini-array of Tesla coils…

" _Cause I'm baaaack!_ "

She threw the switch and watched as lightning crackled and struck him, paralyzing his body.

The thing screamed and hissed, and fell crumpled in a heap when the fuse finally gave out.

Luna grinned and ran to a rope holding up a prop. Kicking a sandbag off, she grabbed on and slid all the way down to the stage.

She came up from behind Linc and frowned when he began squirming. "Hush, mate, it's me."

He stilled under her fingers as she pulled his tape off.

"Ouch!" he hissed.

Luna grimaced. "Sorry." She started to work on his bindings, but slowly grew confused.

AC/DC were still playing their song… but didn't they stop playing when the zombies were gone?

"Luna, what's wrong? Please, hurry!" Linc looked into his eyes scared eyes, and was surprised when a faint _glow_ was reflected in them. "Huh, your eyes are glowing, Luna…"

She looked up and gulped.

" _Back in the back of a Cadillac!_ "

Luna slammed her knife into the chair…

"Hey!" Lincoln squirmed, trying to keep his _mini-me_ away from the blade.

…and she took off running toward that wooden box in the corner.

" _Number one with a bullet, I'm a power pack!_ "

He landed with a crunch on the stage, his eyes following the sensuous back of that stringy teen girl. Eh, he preferred his women a couple hundred years older and with a little less meat on their chalky bones… but when your penis glows like a lightning bug you don't complain about what life hands you.

" _Yes, I'm in a bang with a gang!_ "

Luna heard him guffawing, joking about raping her in a gangbang, and she kicked the box open. Her back was shaking and her face was pale. "Come on, come on!" The elevator music started. "Oh, for the fuckin' love of God and queen!"

Then, a strange catapult looking device appeared… with a spring and plunger and one little handle. She picked it up, gobsmacked, and screamed!

" _They've got to catch me if they want to hang._ "

Luna ran back toward Linc, seeing the boy still trying to squirm his boy bits away from the blade. She rolled her eyes. "Use it to cut your binds, you git!"

Lincoln looked at her in confusion. "Git? Git where? I'm literally tied up!"

Luna rolled her eyes as she hurdled over seats, the glowing one not far behind her. _Fucking Americans._

" _Cause I'm back on the track and I'm beating the flack!_ " He laughed loudly. "Hey, girlie, I'm gonna beat your flack really hard~!"

Luna kept running and running and running. Her body was on fire, her mind was numb, and her lungs were burning. And that stupid weapon the box gave her was sitting uselessly on her shoulder. She turned her eyes toward it and they widened.

How had she missed the football-sized bomb sitting in it!?

" _Nobody's gonna get me on another rap!_ "

He chased until the girl finally backed herself into a corner. Then, he came to a stop and put his arms out, taunting her.

" _So, look at me now-_ "

She turned around with a strange grin. And he tilted his head on confusion, pausing his song.

"Ok, shitpouch, try this one on for size."

She pressed the trigger, and the spring suddenly let loose.

The glowing zombie stared as the little… football? …came toward him.

Luna watched with smiling eyes as the bomb hit him square in the face; and suddenly a blinding light burst in the whole room, shockwaves pushed her onto her butt, and a mushroom cloud of fire and ash erupted in the center of the concert hall.

The sound was deafening, but when it cleared away, Luna saw nothing remaining. Actually, nothing looked changed except for a huge scorch mark because "fuck logic," she guessed. She dropped the gun and flipped two birds with her hands.

"From England with love, shaggin' arsebadger!"

Feeling relieved, she returned to her brother.

Lincoln was huddled on the ground; finally off the chair, but his legs were tangled in ropes. "Luna, _halp!_ "

She rolled her eyes again. Why was her brother so useless today? Seriously, he was acting like Princess Fuckin' Peach. Like, yeah, just sit back and slut off with Bowser while I fight wave after wave of undead.

When he finally got loose he jumped up and hugged his sister tightly. Then, to her shock, he planted his lips on hers and tried stuffing his tongue in her mouth.

She pushed him off. "What the _fuck_ is wrong with you!?"

He shrugged. "I'm the damsel in distress. I'm supposed to give you my virginity in some hot M-rated smut, right?"

Her mouth fell open in shock. "Just because I'm an anglophile doesn't mean I want to get freaky with my brother! I'm not _that_ British."

Linc stood up and coughed awkwardly, blushing. "Sorry, I thought it was one of those types of scenarios."

Luna put her hand on his shoulder and pulled him into her side, her other hand ruffling his hair. "Come on, let's get outta here."

Behind them, the band kept rocking and started up a new song.

" _We're on the highway to hell!_ "

"Nope, we're outta here! Come on, Linc!"

They hurried out the door and into the frigid night air.

Luna trembled and tried to rub warmth back into her arms.

Linc put his arms around his sister to share what little warmth he had.

Her teeth were chattering, but she grinned. "So, how was your first rock concert, bro?"

He grinned, too. "It was awesome!"

* * *

 **Additional Notes:**

The UK leaving the EU joke is all Flagg's. I totes ripped that off of him with tentative permission. But I couldn't help it, it was hilarious! The Bowser slut joke? I laughed a good while at that one... and the glowing one's glowing penis hahaha! If you've played Fallout, then you'll get it. Hilarious.

The three things that inspired me most was Call of Duty: Zombies, Resident Evil, and Fallout. I think it's fairly obvious where I used each one. And glowing ones? I hate those things with a passion. (Shivers)

So, will I write anymore _no loudcest_ works? I likely will, but they'll probably be rare. If Flagg's experience is anything to go by, I'm not expecting many anti-lewds to even bother reading this story. (Shrug)


End file.
